Being predisposed to panic attacks really sucks. Sweaty palms, vasoconstriction causing a pounding in my head, narrowed vision and dizziness, all while having to pretend like all is hunky dory. Heart racing, thoughts and rambling words ablaze in my skull, heart sullen and heavy. Luckily I can do a pretty good job at keeping a full blown attack at bay, but it really sucks when your own brain becomes your kryptonite. Here is my therapy, painting on a digital canvas for 5 minutes - bad vibes be gone.
Monday, July 25, 2011
Sunday, July 24, 2011
Friday's with Lailah - Episode 1
I have made the decision to take Friday's off work and take a pay cut to spend more time with Lailah! Best decision I have ever made. The more I think about the days I am at work and not seeing her firsts and just being with her more, the more sad I was getting, so a day off it is.
So the first Friday off, we went up to Cascade Springs at the top of American Fork Canyon, and it was full of LOTS of Ooooohhhs. She thought the little water falls were amazing and couldn't get enough of all of the butterflies. She even Oooh'd and Awww'd on the drive up with the views she had out the window. It was a great day.
I am thinking the Museum of Natural History next Friday, but we will see. Stay tuned.
So the first Friday off, we went up to Cascade Springs at the top of American Fork Canyon, and it was full of LOTS of Ooooohhhs. She thought the little water falls were amazing and couldn't get enough of all of the butterflies. She even Oooh'd and Awww'd on the drive up with the views she had out the window. It was a great day.
I am thinking the Museum of Natural History next Friday, but we will see. Stay tuned.
Wednesday, July 13, 2011
Friday, June 24, 2011
LOVE THIS KID!!!
Just some pics of the cutest kid ever made...
Treasures are everywhere outside.
Determining her next move.
Cheese.
Well it smells good...I'll give it a taste.
Hi Mom
Ham
Love me...love me not...LOVES ME!
Other things are growing too...
Not only is Lailah growing and changing daily, so is the yard. The poppies have bloomed and there are other little things here and there to keep her busy - interested in touch and smelling everything she sees. Here are a few recent pics of the flora taking place.
Lailah turns ONE!
WHAT? We were just bringing her home yesterday, and now she is a year old. My how time flies by. This little munchkin puts a smile on my face everyday, she simply is the best thing ever. She enjoyed opening presents and eating her giant cupcake, so much so that she gave up on using her hands and just decided to eat it with her mouth. It was a fun day. Happy Birthday Lailah!
Rat Fink Landscapes 2011
While Andy did his thing on Friday of the Rat Fink Reunion, I went off with camera in tow and had some time to myself. I have taken many a picture of the landscapes throughout Manti, Mayfield, Aurora etc. But never with a camera capable of capturing things the way I had wanted it to, and never on my own. I very much enjoyed the day driving around and looking at all the beauty that the area has to offer. If there were more opportunities for a job down there I would probably live there. There’s something about small towns, cleaner air, slower pace – they aren’t so complicated. A giant garden and a lot of land…I’d be okay with that.
So anyway, here are a few shots that I took while I was out and about.
Its never too hard to find a roaming goat
This barn remains the same as I remember it when I was a kid
Hey Lady - You got any corn nuts?
Sun was going down
Okay, so I have taken pictures of this place before...I'm pretty sure there is a picture of it in a previous blog. But this time, I got real adventurous and decided to go up to the house, the exterior just wasn't enough this time I guess.So I start making my way through waist high weeds and a blanket of mosquitoes and the earth is squishing beneath my feet - reminding me of Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doom when short round says "Feels like I step on fortune cookie!" - I knew it was no fortune cookie and there is still remnants of some unknown substance on my chuck tailors - eww.So moving along, with the eebie jeebies now in place I get passed the weeds and I am approaching the house, and keep in mind, I am in the middle of NO-WHERE. This house exists on one very lonely street - with the sun starting to set I couldn't help but be stunned by the odd beauty of the place. I also couldn't help but anticipate the boogeyman appearing from the back shed to come along and claw my face off or something.
As I get closer I can see that there are still items in the house and what I saw when I approached the windows of which no longer hold pains of glass I was mesmerized. The front room contained 2 ancient stoves that are probably worth some major dough...what once kept someone warm now sits alone in an empty room, surrounded by mud and cow pies. The ceiling overhead rotting and waiting to give way to all the memories it may contain. There is something absurdly odd about seeing what was once a home now giving shelter to only 8 legged things and the occasional roaming animal.
Through the chirping of crickets and the buzzing of cicadas the house made eerie noises of its own. It's parts banging in the wind - several times causing my inner voice to say "run - get the hell out of here", my heart beating more loudly as I continued around the back of the house. Now out of site of my car and realizing my phone was on the seat - typical slasher movie ending begins playing in my head when I realize, "wait I am fully clothed, nothing can happen to me, it doesn't work that way", so I tell myself to keep my clothes on and I keep taking pictures, each view of the inside of this place more interesting than the last.
I chose to remain outside of the home - as much as I would have liked to go inside and get a closer look, the home is so rotted with the ceiling falling in, the floor featuring gaping holes, etc. it just didn't look safe...not to mention the dead cat on the floor - probably having succumbed to hantavirus or something. Looking at the pictures still boggles my mind...layers of wallpaper trying to escape the somberness of the walls it once covered, red paint flaking from a banister that once led to an upstairs now leads only to an open sky. It really is hauntingly beautiful.
Afterwards to rub a little bit of the bad juju off, I stopped to take some pictures of these lovely horses. They were gorgeous. - Horses are always aplenty down there.
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